Son: “Dad, do aliens pick their nose?”
Dad: “Uh, wha- what?”
Son: “Do aliens pick their nose?”
Dad: (Thinks a minute, but just smiles, shakes his head and chuckles to himself.) “Ummm, no son. They don’t.”
Son: “How come?”

This is an example of an actual conversation I recently had with my 4 year old son. My wife and I are trying to teach him that any “finger in the nose” is a bad habit, is uncleanly and is something you just don’t do. We say, “when you nose itches, just rub it or go blow your nose.”

Now, you may wonder what Aliens have to do with this blog post. Well, my son has recently been infatuated with the demo of the Monsters vs. Aliens video game for the XBOX 360. Aside from his consistent inquiries as to when we are going to go buy the game, he wants to know why Aliens are “funny looking”, have weird colors, have lots of eyes and why that “Blob thing” can eat and eat and eat.

How or why he made the above correlation is beyond me. As the old saying goes, “Out of the mouths of babes…” That said, feel free to post some crazy things you’ve heard your children or other children say. I’d love to read about them!

If you give a mom a muffin,

She’ll want a cup of coffee to go with it.

She’ll pour herself some.

Her three-year-old will spill the coffee.

She’ll wipe it up.

Wiping the floor, she’ll find dirty socks.

She’ll remember she has to do laundry.

When she puts the laundry in the washer,

She’ll trip over boots and bump into the freezer.

Bumping into the freezer will remind her she has to plan for supper.

She will get out a pound of hamburger.

She’ll look for her cookbook (“101 Things To Do With a Pound of Hamburger”).

The cookbook is sitting under a pile of mail.

She will see the phone bill, which is due tomorrow.

She will look for her checkbook.

The check book is in her purse that is being dumped out by her one-year-old.

She’ll smell something funny.

She’ll change the one year old’s diaper.

While she is changing the diaper, the phone will ring.

Her five-year-old will answer and hang up.

She’ll remember she wants to phone a friend for coffee.

Thinking of coffee will remind her that she was going to have a cup.

And chances are…

If she has a cup of coffee,

Her kids will have eaten the muffin that went with it.